To facebook?

A large part of my being is anti facespace, mybook, linked-in etc, it smacks of self-obsession and if there's anything this generation doesn't need, it's a new avenue for self-expression. We seem to be so busy emoting about our lot that we don't actually do much living. Call me old-fashioned but surely it's better to have too much to relay rather than a detailed rendering of your life, minute-by-minute? This, although never vocalized, has always been my opinion.

Then I moved away from the homeland and the online photo albums became less token and more vital as I watch the lives of my friends evolve. I liked it. It helped me to cope with the distance and although no-one knows this, I'm secretly nice and like to see when people procreate and/or meet new loves. It's sweet to see how happy people are.

Naturally, with any shift of opinion there is always that moment when the backlash begins. And so it was with facebook or whatever platform it is you are using. But now, today, as the fuss has died down and the online networking phenomenon is a routine part of life and no longer a headline, it becomes clear: Facebook is simply the modern equivalent of the phone book, back when the phone book was largely accurate because people stayed put. I remember reading American plays and thinking how easy it was to track someone down back then, all you needed was a name. Men sourced dates, parents introduced each other when their own offspring were too inept to do it and 12 year-olds started talking about school after school. It was simple.

In the 80s and 90s the world went a bit urban, or so it felt and everything seemed to speed up. In speeding up, and moving up, out, on, through, details were lost and one of those details was the concept of using a phonebook. It became infinitely more difficult to find someone, there was still Directory Enquiries but in order for that to work you would have to know some part of your intended's address. Men presumably did not scour the phonebook for dates and parents stopped making smalltalk. The twelve-year olds may have made it work though.

So it was and as my peers and I came of age, phone numbers achieved this hazy holy grail of friendship and wooing, for to have the phone number meant to have access to your intended. Success was gauged by the simple possession, or not, of the phone number. You didn't even have to kiss, you simply had to leave with the number scribbled on a bit of paper to prove that it was on. It makes me feel nostalgic just to remember it.

Now things are different again, now it is more like the days of the phonebook because by knowing someone's name you can, once again, find them. It's nice and simple and honest, because no-one forgets a name. But because everyone on these sites is so accessible, it is also much more difficult to read the signals, especially if you're trying to go out with someone. E-mailing on facebook is almost meaningless, conversely, befriending someone online usually means you stop making any effort to e-mail them at all, because you don't have to, because you have access to them for as long as they use facebook.

Weird. Progress begets it's own problems it would seem.